January 2009

My sister and I are travelling in this relatively not so rickety matatu.  The matatu conductor decides to illegally let someone drop off just in front of a zebra crossing.  As we are about to set off again, the sliding door of the matatu slips off its hinge and is left flying behind us and falling on the road. We are all stare in horror trying not to laugh because that’s just too ludicrous. So first the driver wants to wait for the door to be retrieved but he is being hooted at by other drivers as he is causing traffic.  We drive off leaving the conductor standing in the middle of the road, holding the door watching us go. . .

A crowd of about 12 of us leave a meeting.  The lift opens, and this being the temperamental one that tries to smash you to bits if you aren’t on in 30 seconds flat, we all rush in.  There is this one foreign guy in the lift. He is going down a floor or while the rest of us are on the way down to the ground floor.  The lift shuts, This single foreign guy is now surrounded by a bunch of ebullient girls and guys, talking laughing and bursting into song at intervals; even when he’s on the phone.  The lift travels down all the way to the ground floor without stopping at the intervening floor indicated.  Bump: its stopped. Okay, here we go again, the lift starts travelling up.  Stop. The screen goes blank (had it been a PC screen, it would have been showing the blue screen of death). We are stuck.  It takes fifteen minutes to rescue us, after the poor forgotten foreign man has pressed the panic button about thirty times.  That lift needs be condemned, the multinational that houses it makes enough money to repair it, we think.

My current work station is a desk at an ATM hall.  I’m calmly sitting here carrying on with my work then 2 employees and a lady carrying a large paper bag come in.  They stand next to my desk and proceed to shop for underwear.  I do literally mean ladies inner garments. My desk is now a display case.  I’m trapped.  I can’t get up and leave and the ladies are seemingly not i a hurry.  Imagine my mortification when I observe a customer stand there and watch the proceedings.  The customer then leaves and so do my 3 tormentors. 10 minutes later the very pleasant lady (as I soon learn) comes back and asks me whether we’ve concluded our ladies’ business? I really at that point simply want to sink into a hole. She isn’t so bad though.  She and I discuss how it is I’ve come to do what I do and after stepping out to answer a phone call, she comes back  tells me it was lovely to have met me and we part as smiling acquaintances. . . Whatever you’re doing, please remember that you never know who may be watching.

Now just imagine me in the same ATM hall, minding my work.  It’s the ATM ‘rush as there are 6 people altogether in here.  So the lady at the machine completes her transaction and comes a little closer to my desk. Psst . . . you didn’t hear it.  She then leaves, having completed ‘examining’ her receipt and I’m left here gagging. Why, oh, why? She just farted! A silent killer, and since I can’t grab something and begin fanning my face like crazy, I creatively have to turn my nose and try and  remember how everything eventually moves by osmosis from areas of high concentration to areas of low concentration right out the room, g.a.s.p! And this episode ends with the words of the song ‘ pressure pressure pressure ya nini? wanitesa tesa kwanini?’ singing in my head. . .


It’s began.  A new year, for me to try and, each day, not repeat the mistakes of last year.  A year of 365 days to show God how much I love Him.  A year to read many constructive, instructive and edifying books with my book club and alone. A year to knit many projects that will be appreciated by people that mean a great deal to me.  A year to develop myself further as a member of the human race that must do something profound for it, to honour our Creator. 365 days, moments of time – for thinking and reflection, for appreciation, for making memories,  for sharing friendship, for sowing kindness, for acting in love, for making a difference and each moment as worthwhile as it can get.  For our friends, enemies, families and even ourselves.  It’s up to me.